This past Sunday, both my husband and I were asked to speak in church. I was asked to speak on moral discipline, and he was to speak on 1 Nephi 3:7. This one was a hard talk for me to give, because I realized how worried I was about offending people, instead of speaking of our lack of discipline as a society as well as in the church. How often do we seek to know the truth, even when it may not agree with our current lifestyle? Here is what my talk was (not word for word of course, but this is what I started with)
What standards did the Lord set for us? What standards does the world live by? Where are we in the spectrum of worldly standards and the Lord's standards?
Are we living the best that we can and progressing, or are we happy to sit back where we are and not move forward because, after all, we aren’t going backwards like the rest of the world. So really, it’s like we are being more righteous, even though really the world is just becoming more wicked. Is that really enough?
Elder D. Todd Christofferson said in conference: Moral discipline is the consistent exercise of agency to choose the right because it is right, even when it’s hard.
In an interview with Larry King President Hinckley said: “we expect things of our people. We expect them to do things. We expect them to measure up to certain standards. It isn't always easy to be a member of this church. It's demanding. But it's wonderfully fruitful and has a tremendous affect upon people.”
But how well do we pay attention to what the standards and expectations are?
All of us follow the commandment that we shall not kill, but how about the little things? We are taught to follow the words of the prophet, that what is said through the prophets is directly from the Lord. So what about when the prophet says to do home teaching and visiting teaching, or when he says not to drink caffeine, watch inappropriate movies, listen to inappropriate music, date before 16? Those are small things that we may not consider commandments for whatever reason, but in fact has been told to us from the prophets that are higher standards for us to follow. So how are we doing on those? Do we justify the things we are taught, and look for ways around them?
For example, many people have debated the caffeine issue for years, I remember President Hinckley saying not to drink caffeine in an interview with Larry King back in 1998 (which I found the transcript of online) and some say that until it is forbidden they will continue to drink sodas with caffeine. So instead of looking it up for themselves, they choose to take it as innocence by ignorance. It made me realize even more, how we look for specifics to be commandments, but general statements such as no caffeine, is just a guideline if we want to follow it.
What about not dating before the age of 16? There are many parents who think it’s cute that their child has a boyfriend or girlfriend before, that they are hanging out or just friends so that it’s ok. But look at how many of the youth, both in and out of the church have issues with morality because they are spending so much time alone with the opposite sex. There is a reason that the prophets have said not to date before 16, and even then to group date. It is to save us from the temptations.
We are reminded every month to do our home teaching, visiting teaching, or give service. But how often are the reporting numbers less than 100%? Does drinking caffeine, or not doing service or home and visiting teaching mean that we are unworthy to hold a temple recommend? No. But it is a higher standard that we as members of the church are given to live by.
All of these examples may be hard for us to do, because the rest of the world does worse, so at least we are better than them. But it is not enough!
Society has become desensitized by tv, movies and music. So much that it sends the message that not only is it not a big deal to live with the opposite sex, to lie, and to use vulgar language, but it is acceptable and normal. But it is not so.
We are required to raise our standards continually so that we can be an example to the rest of the world. We can show society that there are better ways to live and be happy. We are given the “plan of happiness” to come to earth, and show our Heavenly Father how much we love him. But society’s lack of respect to each other shows a lack of respect to Him.
Society tells us that truth is relative, I have my own truth, and you have yours. There is no such thing as sin, it’s a moral judgment. But that is why society is failing. A columnist in the Deseret News back in April said “Policemen and laws can never replace customs, traditions and moral values as a means for regulating human behavior. At best, the police and criminal justice system are the last desperate line of defense for a civilized society. Our increased reliance on laws to regulate behavior is a measure of how uncivilized we’ve become.”
Society will continue to fail until we make a change, and call sin what it is, sin. Not a moral judgment. We must teach it in our homes, starting with the little things, to raise a generation of strong people who are willing to stand up to a failing society, and be an example in the effort to change it. Elder Christofferson said that it requires more than an occasional reference to one or another gospel principle, that there must be constant teaching, mostly by example. He said that “the intelligent use of agency requires knowledge of the truth, of things as they really are”. And that “seeking to be neutral about the gospel is, in reality, to reject the existence of God and His authority”.
President Boyd K Packer said “we do not set the standards, but we are commanded to teach them and maintain them. In the church, one is not condemned for tendencies or temptations. One is held accountable for transgression”. Just because we are tempted to do something that doesn’t meet our standards or morals, doesn’t meant that we have to give in to the temptation. We may want to, after all that is why it’s called a temptation, but we don’t have to. We can choose which standard we are going to live up to. Will we choose the world’s standard or will we choose the Lord’s standard. We must make our descisions based on what we know is right, and not allow the world to change our moral discipline, to their standards.
My husband spoke on 1 Nephi 3:7. The basics of his talk (since I don't have his notes) was that many people compare members of the church to Nephi, and non members to Laman and Lemuel. But in reality, all of them left their homes, they all endured the same struggles, but they all delt with it differently. Laman and Lemuel chose to complain the entire time, while Nephi did it without complaint. It is more accurate that they all represented the members of the church, because there are members who go and do willingly, and those who complain the whole time. Such as in home teaching, do we do it willingly, or wait and do it at the last second if we do it at all. (I'm not doing his talk justice)
Basically all of the lessons in our ward on Sunday in Sacrament, Priesthood and Relief Society, was that we can and should be doing better everyday.
